In the midst of struggle there are blessings

Greetings! This is my first posting here. This has been a very difficult year in so many ways and at the same time it has been a year of many blessings. I can't write about the difficulties without mentioning the blessings. The economy as well know is still in the tank. States, the nation and corporations are all struggling. Budgets have been cut and everyone is cautious. For someone who is self employed this spells "bad news". The phone stops ringing and the e-mail inbox is full of junk mail, there are not requests for my services. I am a performing artist (dance, music and storytelling), educator and consultant for non profits and my work is about peace, justice, creativity and diversity. As much as people want and need these qualities in their lives at this time they are willing to forgo them because of the economy. However, it is not completely a dry well. Currently I am in Brazil where I am working with a colleague who wants to bring creativity that builds community to her small town in Southern Brazil. This is very fulfilling and satisfying work that warms the heart and gives me the energy to get up in the morning.
In April this year I lost my Dad. Even though he had been sick with cancer for 6.5 years there was no cushioning the pain that went through my body when I got the phone call from my sister, two words "Daddy's gone" and the waterworks started. I made my way home and for the next week went through the emotional roller coaster of saying goodbye. This was a huge financial hit, further putting a dent in an already empty tank. While home at the funeral I met a long lost love and even though I was not home to find romance, I realized that even though I had not seen her for 23 years I was still in love. Also while at the funeral I saw my Granddaughter for the first time. She was born exactly a month before her Great Grandfather passed ... they didn't meet in person ... but I am sure they passed each other beyond the curtain where life ends and begins. Pain and blessings. I have since returned home to Africa to be with my Mom and Sister as we go through this time of loss and reflect on the amazing legacy that our father left for us. Needless to say this has been a further strain on an already strained fiscal situation. While home on this second visit I got to play with both my grandchildren, help my Daughter and Son in law navigate a rough patch in their marriage and rekindle a 23 year dormant relationship. I am blessed, but the tears have been plenty, laughter is present and I have not lost my faith or hopeful outlook. I just wish the phone would ring a little more often and that my inbox had more request for my services than offers for viagra. thank you for reading and I wish you a wonderful week.